why do you want to have kids?

yes, after questioning marriage, i am back with questioning the need to have kids.... :P

ok , before u jump to conclusions, like a "friend" of mine did....i have NOT married!!....yet... :P

so the other day, i was having a discussion as to why does anyone want to have kids?

reasons to NOT have 'em - 

1. Noisy ;

2.Smelly ;

3. Tendency to poop at random places ;

4. Repetition of what you say, as soon as they start talking.....yes, i say some fucked up weird shit ya know?

get me? :P

5. will make ur house / rooms that they have access to, as can be seen in d pic above ^^

6. u need to spend a LOT on them....dude....new clothes....new crib....new cycle....new @#$@$%!$#@%

'nuf said!

7. end of ur and ur spouse's romantic life....or...ummm...ur "life partner"s....i wanna be in d good books of people with all kinds of sexual preferences ya know? :P

8. (damn this list is long) they wanna take over ur t.v remote / bike / car / (worst case, like in mine...i.e., d reverse ...i.e where i am d kid...sheeh) ur business!!!

so, yeah....i think i made my point....

when i got a piercing pain in my right ear..!!

yep. mom and dad. wrenching my ear like it's a bottle of "goti soda" and their hands are the openers...

ummm...what's goti soda? hit d link above ^^

looks something like this >>

(don't you get really irritated when i go totally off-point and put some weird and random pics in my posts? :P)

AND here we are with the reasons to have em....

of course, with d BLUE text showing my counter-arguments... :P

1. you are furthering your lineage

(ummm...as aptly pointed out in my previous post i think my cousins are doing a pretty good job of it....i got at least 2 dozen nieces and nephews....and more coming, as i hear...lineage continuation established...ftw!!)

2. you need support in your old age

(i shall buy a friggin walking stick! as i can see myself, and my generation....we SOMEHOW manage to take care of ourselves {with a few exceptions} ...let alone taking care of you....{as mom keeps saying to me}...and hell no, i don't wanna depend on a kid to take care of me in my old age.....i shall take care of my own self....and my spouse, IF i end up making d mistake called marriage....else i can live on some bread...and mayo....and some chips....and maybe a burger once a week....shit! i gotta start saving money!! O.o )

3. you are furthering your gene pool by reproducing

(now, to this one i say - T-Rex Shit! {yeah...bull didn't seem to cut it enuf} damn d gene pool....i ain't gonna go through hell for furthering something that i don't care at all about!!)

4. we wanna see our grandchildren's faces!!

(refer previous post again... :P you can see the faces of d kids of my cousins and get over it...they're technically your grandchildren only....and please....you will see more than their faces if i bring them into this world....poo...pee...random mud etc shit brought from playing ground revelries...blood....broken bones...bricks...mortar....  ok..ok..that went a bit too far...but you get d point....)

that takes care of 'em....

and then i hit upon a brilliant post on the subject by a blogger i simply adore!!! :D

i think you should read it, in order to understand what i mean to say, and am clearly failing to do :P

for now, reproduction is a BIG no-no.....and i shall carry condoms with me all d time....

cuz i get laid every night...right? :P

NjoY LyF bloggers!! :D

random poem time!!! :D

it's been a while since i have been euphoric...

such moments i wish to capture in my mind's click...

life had been going on somber...boring and routine...

the first click happened when she offered me...her hand so pristine...

and there i was on cloud 9...wondering if it's a dream...

the second click happened when we kissed....with mad vigour...i wished to scream...!!

but then life's been an upward journey...

*touchwood*....why is my tummy today so churny...??

the blocks start to fall in place...

i know i have said the same line many times to your face...

but this time it has gone beyond the first steps two...

somehow it fells real...i know it's so true...!!

the problems suddenly seem to dither away...

there's nothing that'll make me from my focus sway...

oh let the madness go on...life...her...and me...

touchwood just doesn't seem enough...let me go hug a pine tree...!!!

;)

yes, i am still talking about my GF....d Ritz :D [link to previous post here]

OMG!

i wish i had her!

i mean...the modified version of d car...

quit drooling over ur keyboard looking at the hot chick...

err...ok ok...it was me who did that.... *blush*

but i wiped d keyboard and kept it in d sun to dry for half hour, ok?

found some pieces of pizza...noodles...and bread sticks in it....in time too...i was hungry!!

:P

NjoY LyF BloggerS!!! :D

~~ time travel ~~

i am fascinated by the fascination we humans have for time travel....

ok, before any of you jump to the conclusion i fear you are going to jump to, this post is NOT inspired by "acction repplay"...but by "Hot Tub Time Machine"...

so, as you should have read the reviews in d links above.....d bollywood take on time travel pretty much sucks...and hollywood wins hands down with it's take on an ever-intriguing concept....

so...that just got my thought wheels churning....

so....WHY are we SO intrigued by time travel?
take a look at a few genuine  attempts at making a time machine...and of course, the eventual failure at d same..

and then there are those who cant stop thinking about possibilities for their uses...

and this was just a slow lift.....caught by someone like me, with a good sense of humor... ;)

what? i DO have a good sense of humor ok? :P


so....i fail to understand the need to travel back in time!!

ok...ok...there were times when i wished i could go back and change ONE small thing....ok...maybe two....ummm...now that i think of it....3....no wait...4....5.....6....ahh...d list can go on.... ;)


but, i dont see why one would want to go back in time....future is justified....so u can make profits....ummm...actually,,,,even past can yield profits....

ANYWAY....the point being....

that time travel, as interesting as it might seem, except for some really tragic / life changing stuff, is pretty useless....to travel just for making money, i.e.


cant we dream about our needs....aspirations....hopes....and make them true now?

let's just start dreaming real hard....and working on those even harder...!!

cuz...as far as i know...i aint a scientist to build a time machine....and none that i know have built one...and even if they do, human tendency to be selfish comes in the way of time travel....

so...let's live today....not in yesterday...not for tomorrow....but IN today....FOR today..!!!


p.s. - pls share with me if u make a time machine... ;)


ah....yess....another pointless blog....

Mission FUCKIN' Accomplished! :P


NjoY LyF Bloggerzzzzzzzz :D

Andro-Magic :D

what can your phone do?

make calls? send texts...?

ok ok.. browse d internet!!!

wow! :P

google , through android has undertaken a task to change just that.

so now you can...

browse d internet..

chat...

see videos...

locate your car without searching for it...

connect the phone to ur car audio..of curs..

play loadsa games...

make skype calls...

find resto's...

check movie timings...

access google-sky...a map of d stars :P

play musical instruments...

edit videos...

find itself, if u send it a specific text...i.e..start ringin like crazy for u to see where it is :P

and...

and...

and...

CONTROL UR DESKTOP COMP THRU WI-Fi.

Sweet! :D

iphone....these ones actually work!! and we can make calls too!! :p

NjoY LyF BloggerS!! :D

Girl Problems? No Problem!! :D

After AGES of analysis, and neck_breaking research, here are a few, small pointers on how to behave around girls / the girl(s) u r trying to impress....(p.s.: yes, i know u r hitting on multiple girls at the same time :P )

1. You are always wrong. if you make a mistake, obviously you say sorry. if She makes a mistake, she is "already feeling bad about it"...and anything u say to instigate her, will lead to you saying sorry.

2. she is "just perfect". the answer for "am i fat?"

      
      this is a phenomenon which almost never has the right answer...more of an impromptu solution required here..ya know,..that question in the exam, for which no matter how much u have prepared, you will need to think really hard and out of the world(not simply out of the box) to get it right....? yeah. that one.

     


however, here are a few options you could use - 

a) of course not baby! what made you think of it? [result - bug hug]

b) ummm...i dunno....why..? [result - kick in d sack...and possible break-up]

c) weren't you always this fat? [result - rampage. u r dead.]

d) yeah...maybe a little [result - girl problem solved. she will leave you.]
e] yeah you ugly, fat b****...go make me a sandwich! [result - instant death, shotgun headshot. pwnd]

3. how to make the girl laugh - 

    wow...this one's a toughie....calls for an independent analysis...

    Your Joke works - 

     a) unless your joke is not degrading or sexist.

         a)i) If you're not sure, it probably is.

     b) your jokes are funny only the first time.

     c) it might be funny when you used the chopsticks to make a walrus face on your 
         first date. now it's just embarassing.

     Also, don't make jokes about her, OR her friends OR her parents OR her neighbour OR her neighbour's stupid lookin Alsatian dog OR her clothes OR her choice in colors OR her xyz...you get the drift. ;)

4. how to treat them right....

    now, this is one hell-of-an issue....haven't yet got it right...just trying my best here...

    a) pay attention to her....i mean really...don't just nod your head and think about today's football/cricket match

       a)i) if you did not pay attention, she is bound to ask you what you feel about what 
             she said half an hour ago...(and never will ask if you WERE paying attention)

         ii) if this happens, just say this - i agree with your point of view....after all, you 
            ARE Perfect! (follow up with a nice smile, and hug / kiss depending on 
            whether she lets you touch her..)

    b) be nice. but please, for the love of god, don't smother.

        b)i) God help you if you team up with your friends to make fun of her. 
              no seriously. better, make it a self-shotgun-headshot. less painful..

    c) take interest in things she likes.

        c)i) this means you have to go shopping.

          ii) and enjoy it. no moping!

well, that's as far as our research at team aquaguy has gone....will update you as and when we come up with solutions / studies on more issues related to the female species.

now that that's out of the way, let me take my gf for a spin! :D

oh stop giving me looks you idiots! i m not a fool to go around with a girl....got a different gf...refer previous post :D

NjoY LyF bloggers! :D

da new gf ;)

well,finally got hitched...

we are very much in love...

she loves my touch...i love her response to my commands...

she has a mind of her own...i have my ways of controlling her...

she likes to run all along d winding roads...and I love to take her on those twists!! ;)

yes,u guessed it right....got my own car :D

pics follow.... ;)

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Bart Quotes :D






-i am not my long lost twin...

-i am not the last Don...

-'Bagman' is not a career choice... :'(...

-a burp is not an answer...

-No one cares what the definition of "is" is.... :O

-It's potato...not potatoe... :O

-Thanks to television, i cant remember what happened 8 minutes ago! :D

-Fridays are not "pants optional" :-|

-i will not say "She's dead" during roll call! :D

-i do not have diplomatic immunity... :'(

-Internet! Is that thing still around? B-)






;) ;)

what drives you?


a philo post coming your way after a long time....

this post has come to be due to my job requirement, to keep my staff "motivated" and "satisfied" with their work life...

now, for the background, the company has already taken care of the work-personal life balance by keeping the working hours down to 8 hours, instead of the industry norm of 9.5 hours...so that area is shot down...no scope for improvement there...

and also, recently pay structures were revised to bring them at par with market conditions....another option shot down...!!

so what DOES motivate people?

for starters, it is the quality of work they are doing....and their perception of their abilities being explored and optimally utilized...for instance, there was a team member who was talking of leaving the company , in spite of the massive hike in his pay package...reason - he was feeling his skills were not being fully utilized and he was being under-challenged in his current role....solution is still in progress on that front.....while my manager has suggested an advisory / training role for him, i am also exploring the possibility of assigning him a totally different role, and one that really does justice to this CA + CS + CWA Final student.

another team member, was low as she was not able to get an enthusiastic feedback from the location i.e., the client side...no matter how well she performed her activities, or timely she was, there was always a paltry / bland response from the other side....on investigation i found out that the client was dissatisfied, as she always used to communicate on Office Communicator, and rarely called up...and on the rare occasions that she did, client was more than happy to oblige...now while company policy urges to minimize telephonic conversations, this was a rather strange scenario...and i admit, quite silly on the part of the client....so we arranged for a mic and headphones for the team member....voice chat on OC. simple solution. and both are happy now.


so what drives YoU?

for me it is comfortable means of transport....and at my convenience...the main reason why i never take company transport....hate to have that tension on my head of having to go to, and leave from, office, according to the cab timings...

and comfort also ranks high in that....i always take the car to office when it is raining...no matter how light a drizzle...i hate going to office looking like a wet chicken....errr...wet elephant maybe? ok ok...that part is irrelevant...but jokes and me...perpetual combination...old habits die hard, you see... ;) :P

and yes, the next most important aspect.....Respect.


i am totally touched by the amount of respect, trust and admiration the team members have for me...i mean, i always believed that i have average abilities..and am an ok'ish team worker....but simple things like giving priority to helping someone even when i am choked to death in my own stuff...or simply pulling a few strings to get someone i know from another department to come and help someone in their tasks...make them feel liked...make them feel respected...and that respect is reciprocated....

i have always believed and advocated...give respect, and you will get it back manifold more...and this scenario applies to all people and situations...i am sure, there will be only 1 in a million, who will not reciprocate respectful and benevolent behavior...


but am still in the process of learning...

so, my dear readers....

what drives YOU???

dunno wtf m doin in dis post :P

my blog. my rules.

any questions?

keep them to yourself! :P

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iffectz baba!?! O.o

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