of morning walks and falls

it's been three months now, that i have started my morning walk routine....but the last 2 weeks have been somewhat "accidental".. :O

so, i started going on looonnnggg walks in the morning, since i am a morning person, and had become as fat as an American..

ok, not so much...but maybe...ok ok fine! more than this! :/

and i love going on walks alone...me, the music, and open roads....

but last week, a dog decided to block my path on the one-off occasion that i decided to get into a jog.  :|

i resembled Mr.Humpty the Dumpty, and had a nice big fall. :/

sprained my wrist, and hurt my palm....
oh! someone! give me Amrutanjan Balm!

aaaannnyyywaaayyyy.... this resulted in me not being able to type/write/eat with my right hand for 3 days :(

and today again! i had a big fall...this time, however, there was a twist to it...

i was walking along...minding my own business...climbing down the "hanuman tekdi"...when i saw a group of girls climbing up the hill...it was raining before, so the hill stones were a bit slippery...i was being extra careful and watching my step...

when this group of girls came near me, i stepped aside, to let them pass...but being teens, they were busy jumping and hopping around..

and the inevitable happened >>

and this one girl, fell ON ME. :/

now, normally i would take a girl falling for/on/around me / in love with me / falling over me...etc...as a good thing...

(what? it DOES happen ok! girls DO fall FOR me....ok a few have...ok FINE 1 girl fell for me....ok FINE FINE FINE! fell for my online avatar which is a beefy hunk 6 ft tall and highly charismatic etc)

but this time, she fell on me, and i fell down on my tush. my sweet soft tush! :(

aaannnnddd i feared the worst...

you see, teens have a thing against me...it's a plot really...believe me i know you guys do it on purpose!

what plot you ask? 

they call me UNCLE. X(

i mean seriously! i have a mustache and the occasional beard is also kept...but by no angle do i look like anyone's UNCLE. :|

So i closed my eyes, and waited for the worse to come..

i feared those words...

i anticipated another moment of agony...

i could already hear it in my head...

shortly i couldn't take it any longer and opened my ears to hear what i did not want to hear...

What would she call me? she would definitely call me Uncle. or Bhaiyya at best. god dammit why was i not careful...why did i not move farther from that group of girls...

as all these questions ran in my mind...

i heard the sweetest voice say...

"dude! i am so sorry! are you ok? sorry man!"

DUDE!

MAN!

i am no longer an uncle! :D

girls actually think i am a "dude"!!

i suddenly felt handsome! i felt hot! i felt attractive! i felt...i felt...i felt...ecstatic! :D

of course , the happiness was short-lived, when she called her girl-friends "dude" too. :|

so apparently everyone is a dude. :/

everyone is a camel penis. :/

(check out webster's definition of "dude")

but at least for now, i shall assume that she called me dude for the sheer dude-ness dripping off of me...

for the rugged handsomeness that embodies my persona...

the inexplicable attraction she felt towards me...

etc...etc...

enough self-bloating eh? :D :P

and now here i am, nursing a smarting tush...that refuses to join the rest of my body in celebration of dude-ness... :/

until next time...

ciao bloggerz! :D

As i Mature...

As i mature...I've learned that you can't make someone love you.

All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in. :P

I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just assholes. X-(

I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it. :O

I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that you better have a big willy or huge boobs. ;)

I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others.

They are more screwed up than you think...

I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities. ;)

I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of money to take it's place. :P

I've learned that 99 of the time, when something isn't working in your house, one of the kids did it. :D

I've learned that the people you care most about in life, are taken from you too soon, and all the less important ones just never go away.. :(

On the Confusing Side of 25..

‎23-25 is not a nice age for a man.... 


your ex-gfs are getting married , 


Your career has just started, 


Elders treat you as unproven theorems, 


College guys feel that you are too old to have in their group... 


You seem to enjoy both cartoons and the news. 


You can no longer eat whatever you wish without putting on weight. 


You look like an ape if you don’t shave daily. 


You are not invited for weekend cricket matches . 


Every Aunty you meet asks “Shaadi kab kar rahe ho beta!!” 


while uncle asks “Career ka kya socha hai beta…”.. 








When the reality is that you are just riding the wave and going with the flow… 


You have all the confidence in the world but little achievements to show, 


You already have the first hand experience of life , 


You know that whatever you have been taught about the world in schools has been sheer 


waste of time. 


You can be denied a job even after passing the test and you could be given a job if you 


know someone placed high enough… 


Politics till now was a dirty word but now you feel it everywhere. 


You know now love is not that blind and that friendship has its terms and conditions. .


You know there is nothing for granted and free lunches are not free… 






Your overconfidence is now making way for....


 a humble conscience! :)

Tree-ally bad :(

The beautiful rubber tree...
from my balcony i always used to see...

in rains it looked like a majestic umbrella...
in the suns it used to provide shade like a good fella... :D

many a rainy days and evenings i spent...
looking at the raindrops fall off it's shoulders magnificent...

and it hid from prying neighbors...the door to my room...
now privacy has taken a sudden fall...and gone to it's doom..!! :O

for my beautiful green friend has been felled by the corporation...
no end i can see to my grieving...this empty sensation..!!

my friend was cut down...oh how he bled white blood...
tears came non stop...it was like a flood..!! :(

oh dear rubber tree...we won't forget thee...
in our minds and photos u will live for...eternity..!! :)

- dedicated to a rubber tree just outside my room balcony...which was felled today... :)

Chaddi Jaisa Rang hai Tera...

Chaddi jaisa rang hai tera, naade jaise baal..
Ek tuhi bakwas hai gori, baaki sub hai maal... :D

Chaddi jaisa rang hai tera, naade jaise baal...

Ek tuhi bakwas hai gori, baaki sub hai maal...

Ek tuhi bakwas hai gori, baaki sub hai maal...

Jis raste se tu gujre, voh cactus se bhar jaye
Jis galli se tu gujre, voh choohon se bhar jaye
Tere pair ki bhayanak aahat sote bhoot jagaye
Jo patthar choo le gori tu voh koyla ban jaye!!

Tu jisko mil jaye voh, tu jisko mil jaye
Vo ho jaye transfer to bengal.... (dont get me wrong...Bengal is a good place...really...VERY clean... :P TeeHee)
Ek tuhi bekaar hai gori, baaki sub hai kamaal
Kachhe jaisa rang hai tera, friendship band jaise baal..!! (what? it can be ok! )
Ek tuhi pehelvaan hai gori, baaki sub size zero maal!! :P

Jo be-rang ho us par kya kya rang jamate log
Jo be-rang ho us par kya kya rang jamate log
Tu idiot na jane tera mazaak udate hai hum log!! :P

Chehra bhar bhar thookein tujhpe aate jaate log
Chail chabeeli rani thoda, Chail chabeeli rani thoda
pocket se rumal nikaal....

Ek tuhi pehelvaan hai gori, baaki sub size zero maal!!

Toilet jaisa rang hai tera, noodles jaise baal!!
Ek tuhi maruti van hai gori, baaki sub BMW, Audi, Merc and all....

Dhanak ghata kaliyan aur taare, sub hain darte khoob
Dhanak ghata kaliyan aur taare, sub hain darte khoob

Ghazalen hon ya geet hon mere sub mein tera Bhoot!!

Yunhi chamakti rahe hamesha mere room ki light...andhera ho ya dhoop
Kyonki Dar lagta hai...

Kyonki Dar lagta hai...

Kahise tu aa na jaae chudail.....

Ek tuhi bakwas hai gori, baaki sub hai maal...

Chaddi jaisa rang hai tera, naade jaise baal..

Ek tuhi pehelvaan hai gori, baaki sub size zero maal!!

Toilet jaisa rang hai tera, noodles jaise baal!!

Ek tuhi bakwas hai gori, baaki sub hai maal...

Ek tuhi pehelvaan hai gori, baaki sub size zero maal!!

Ek tuhi maruti van hai gori, baaki sub BMW, Audi, Merc and all....

Wah Wah!

(yes, there is still a restraining order on those of you trying to find me to murder me. :|

art ki koi kadar hi nahi!)

aye! tomato kisne maara?

ooh...tomato soup!

ek-do ande bhi maar do yaaro....omlette se pet bhar loonga :D

;)

Njoy LyF BloggerZZ :D

Why is man such a territorial beast?

Why are their classifications based on which place someone comes from?

For that matter, there are quite a few territorial animals too...but they at least stick to their demarcated zone for claiming ownership over land...but we humans tend to go beyond the limits of land and territory.

We want to claim ownership on mannerisms...appearance...food that we cook...the way that we speak...

But then, in a way doesn't that lend us individuality too?

My question is, how far are we going to go to maintain this individuality...?

Also, how long can we survive in seclusion? We think we are self-sufficient as far as resources for survival are concerned...but has anyone tried to see the larger picture?

That if we want to be in existence for a longer period, we need to come together and take decisions.

The separation i am talking about is not the one based on religion / language / geography...

The territory that i want to unite, is the decisions taken as a human whole...i am talking about nuclear energy...i am talking about developing economical means of powering our world...renewable sources of energy...cuz in the long run, all other things will take a back seat...

Imagine a scenario where there is no fossil fuel to burn in ur vehicles...no sun to cover our heads, because the smog from the burnt out fossil fuels covers our skies in too thick a blanket to let it shine through...THEN talk to me about hindu-muslim...or any other religious factions for that matter...i would LoVe to debate on that then. :|

In our quest for current survival, we have almost completely forgotten to ensure that we can survive tomorrow also... :)

I for one, do not believe in reproduction, seeing as to how much all my “fellow” human beings are already doing in that regard...so, although i might not be planning to add to the horde of resource consumers, there are many more who will be...

what i am saying here...if am saying anything...is not something new...these very things have been said by many before me...

There needs to be a way to put in place a “chakra” or cycle of utilisation.

The resources we use, should be renewed...they should be put back in the environment...there should be a cycle of origin-growth-utilisation-development-origin..........

High time we did this people...

Because i ain't d one leaving behind offsprings...those who are, better stand up n listen :)

thus ends another random blog post :P :P

NjoY LyF bloggerzz :D

Every night in my dreams
I see you, I feel you
Cuz only there u wont sue me for that...


Far across the distance
And spaces between us
You have come to show me ur new Car.. :|



Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that ur pants are.....not on...
Once more you open the door
And you're here in my house! You idiotic Perv!
And my rant will go on and on






Love can touch us one time
And you'll be scarred for lifetime
And never let go till she's gone



Love was when I loved you
And Hate was When i Hated You!! (Duh!)
In my life we'll always Rock ON!! \m/ (Hai ye wakt ka ishaara!!)


Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the ur shirt too...is gone!! (kameene!!)
Once more you open the door
And that's it i m callin d cops :|
And ur Jail Term... will go on and on....

You're here, that's d only thing I fear!!
And i hope...it's my gun that...my left hand is on...
We'll stay forever this way!!
i just ate...some potatoes...
And my fart will go on and on... (tarrrr....tarrrr.....plebhhhhttttccc)