So, i read
this blog post and started thinking...
This mentality that she was writing about, is seen everywhere in India..it is a real nuisance, and i don't disagree with the thoughts.
But....
I don't know why those men, who are not a part of that "flock", are never mentioned!
There ARE men who are chivalrous. There ARE men who respect women. There ARE men, who don't start staring at girls in mini skirts/shorts/whatever it is you think attracts those kind of "looks".
Don't get me wrong, i have nothing against whatever you girls want to wear..or don't...for one, i roam around in shorts in the whole city (not that i am a pretty sight :P ).
Then comes the point of "judging" women by their beauty.
Welcome to the dating scene. I have been told on my face, by girls, that i am not good looking enough.
Forget being judged, can u imagine someone doing that to your face? Only if you've gone through it, will you understand what it feels like.
So did i feel objectified? Depressed? Angry?
No, i took it as immaturity on the girls' part, and let it be.
Now you'll go ahead and say - "it isn't just the dating scene, we girls are judged everywhere"...I don't think this isn't true for men too...it's just that it isn't as obvious as is with girls. And dare i say, girls are better at not being overt about it.
And well, aren't you the ones that get help the most too?!!
If a girl is involved in an accident, a huge crowd gathers to help them. I fell from my bike once, and you know how many people came to help me, in a crowded square? None.
Again, i am not gonna make the mistake of generalizing things, but all i want to say is, you get many benefits too! Take the yin with the yang!
Then comes the "respect for feelings".
I would say it is safe to say, that it goes both ways.
We are portrayed as these emotion-less, hunks of meat, who simply don't have any feelings whatsoever...
When we break-up with someone, we just move on to the next "target". We don't even care to turn back, and take a second look..we use girls like sexual objects...and the list goes on.
So again, am i like, some sort of anomaly?
Cuz when i broke up, i was sad. Depressed. I kept trying to find what went wrong. Not for days or weeks, but months!
We DO have feelings...we DO care...we DO change for you!
We might not be scared to get out of our houses, but some of us do have parents who get worried if we get late.
Our parents don't like it that we're dating someone or "getting some"...cuz after all, aren't our parents too, a part of this image-management system put up by "society"..?
Yes, there were times when we were considered the "Superior" sex..or the more powerful one, or whatever the crap it is that "society" believes in.
But in the end, it is the media (and to some extent, girls themselves, when they talk about it with a "feminist" bias) that is putting all of this in our brains...has been, for a long time...and will continue to do so...and you know why? Extremes matter..and rake in eyeballs.
Do you think a normal, peaceful shop-owner in Iraq would've made headlines? No, instead,
this girl did. Because extremes "touch" the target audience..!
Emotion sells.
To conclude, i am not saying that what you wrote was entirely wrong...or that such men don't exist at all...all i want to say is, we are doing something wrong, if we portray only one part of the reality.
And that it is not the Whole Truth.
I'm just sitting here, hoping that we will really get an "equal and just" society. Someday.
-An Average Urban Guy.
